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then there I
stood upon a plain
void of plant and void of bird
til’ in the distance, a shadowed wing
appeared as slight, then stronger still
til’ stood before me crown of white
a mighty eagle
wings black, black as night…
within
his talon clutched a twig
of needles green and long, a pine
and dropping it upon the ground
it multiplied before my eyes, leaving forest
where plain once stood
leaving eagle screeching long then longer
calling to the silence of the wood
calling out
a woodland people,
tall and dark; a woodland people
strong and good; a woodland people
calling them from their Mother
from this portal of the earth
til’ sending out a primal cry, giving thanks for this their birth
sending forth a small child bearing
with the blessed twig
in hand
and laying it down before the eagle
giving homage to the eagle
as his wings took to flight and left the land
flying high above the clouds
looking down he blessed his people
sending waters, and the rain,
sending too the mighty bison and the seasons
cold and warm
then disappeared into the horizon
christening the Dakota Nation
born
bkmackenzie
2010
Note: On this piece I would appreciate feedback – because sometimes my ear may hear it different from the reader…I plan here to write a series in tribute to my ancestors…so I want to get it right…thanks everyone..bkm
Just awesome! Fabulous story shared in a splendid way.
thanks.
thank you trisha, this is a tribute to my mothers ancestors – i hope to be adding more pages encompassing others..bkm
Get it write??? Get it write???? You did for sure. A treasured appreciation of your ancestry is key to understanding who and what you are and building upon it. Love and Light, Sender
a wonderful creation hymn…i think this would be wonderful read…its got a gentle flow to my ear…nice one shot!
thank you Sender and Brian for your comments….they are much appreciated and taken to heart….bkm
“calling them from their Mother
from this portal of the earth
til’ sending out a primal cry, giving thanks for this their birth”
Agree with Brian, reads like a wonderful creation hymn.
thank you Dustus….your comments are much appreciated and always welcome…blessings…bkm
Wonderful tribute..
The eagle begins the birth of an epic. Powerful poem.
It is so legend like. Something you would want to pass down to generations. The eagle of course having legendary qualities
Nice One Shot
Moon smiles
Much appreciated moonduster…..I hope I can do justice in continuing this project…blessings…bkm
thank you everyone for feedback on this piece….i have begin working on the next one…thank you again…bkm
Lots of One Stoppers ‘standing’ in their poems this week… some by taking a stand, others by standing and observing the world.
Out-STAND-ing work!
thank you so much Eric…really appreciated…bkm
crafted very well indeed
a lot of power and emotion to the words
thank you for posting it
Thank you Widow…blessings…to you…bkm
When dream becomes myth, then myth becomes tradition, and reason and dream merge again in a mandala of faith and observation. This piece, such great imagery as a film, yet deeply metaphorical as well. Excellent piece. Kudos to you. Thanks, Gay (@beachanny)
Thank Gay…so much for your kind words and for leaving a comment….blessings…bkm
wow. “screeching long then longer” – this is powerful – modern myth and a reverent tribute.
Thank you joaquin….always love hearing from you…bkm
I love the rhythm, the vision, the heart.
Well done!
Amazing and wonderfully written =3 I can see all the scenery portrayed in my mind and do enjoy them a lot, Thank for sharing=P~
hi bkm…a fabulous write but you asked for some feedback..so hope you dont mind??
the way i read it i would have dropped the word “within” on to a line on its own…by keeping it there you rushed the pause and marred the flow of night & white…
apart from that..this piece reads as an amazing prayer or in that case chant..excellent and look forward to the next piece..cheers pete
thank you pete – i appreciate it much…it is good to have another poets ear…..blessings…bkm
hey..i am always happy to help others out so never hesitate to dm on twitter or email..and when you have done nothing but support me over the months how could i refuse…cheers pete
This is excellent. Gorgeous rhythm, like drums.
This is wonderful! It is a great tribute to the birth of a nation. The eagle as a majestic symbol.
Mine is here. http://razzamadazzle.wordpress.com/2010/09/07/bling/
Reading it slow, again and again. Lots of feelings surface. Fear, lonliness, wonder, comfort.
All in a place close to my heart.
This is a brilliant poem. Full of hope, emotion, inspiration. It had a nice flow and was full of wonderful imagery. Keep writing!
Amazing story, loved your writing
breath taking!
please don’t stop